Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Queen Bitch

"She's an old-time ambassador
Of sweet talking, night walking games
And she's known in the darkest clubs
For pushing ahead of the dames
If she says she can do it
Then she can do it,
she don't make false claims
But she's a Queen,
and such are queens
That your laughter
is sucked in their brains..."
David Bowie, Queen Bitch


Hel is a bitch.
More than that, she's a scary bitch. A scary two-faced bitch.
And she lives in a scary place. A scary, two-faced place with goatshit and blood pools and lazy minions, but it did have some of the nicest bathrooms I have ever seen.
I don't want to go back. I have to, but oh I so do not want to.
I mean, I've got a really strong stomach and it's been a long time since I threw up, but that hall was just fucking gross.
Also, fuck frost giants. Especially fuck the ones who die dramatically on me before I get the chance to kill them myself.

I guess I probably should get out of the killing mindset though, since Queen Bitch wants me to go solve a mystery for her before she'll give me Marie's body.
Do I look like fucking Scooby Doo? I have to figure out why her father was trying to steal the Black Feather Shroud from her. My gut reaction? Fuck if I care, what do you want with a voodoo body anyway?
Also, why does Loki do anything? Shits and giggles, my friends. Shits and giggles.

At least I didn't have to walk anymore, Ciara brought out her boat and she and Nate had been taking turns carrying it while Harlan molested this glass thing that keeps him from freezing to death. I wish I hadn't told Ciara, she's been way too nice to me now. It was worth it to see her tear it up going against Modgud though, all decked out in borrowed relics. Reminds me, I've got some ideas for some new paintings. Exploding dragons and broken shields. Ugh, sounds like the title for some bad poetry.

Fuck.

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